Do You Struggle With Having Breakdowns vs Breakthroughs?June 15th, 2010Hi All! Yes, many clients hire me as their Branding/Marketing Consultant and/or Publicist, but I’m also a Certified Business Coach. And, regardless of “what” role someone hires me for, my “coaching” hat gets put on at some point. Why? Because even some of the most successful people I work with often struggle with having breakdowns vs breakthroughs…and it affects their professional and personal success and progress. And, no, I don’t mean major emotional breakdowns requiring medication! I mean those obstacles that get thrown at you all the time in business and life, that cause you moments of feeling overwhelmed and paralyzed…typically due to self doubt. So this blog post isn’t one of my typical ones pertaining to PR, Publicity, Branding, Marketing or Social Media tips. It’s focused on YOU, and how to avoid having breakdowns vs breakthroughs. Honestly, many people suffer from self-sabotage in the form of not taking responsibility for their actions. It can be more comfortable for them to stay in the “victim role” because they can put blame on everyone else for whatever is not working in their lives. And although placing blame on others for your own “issues” can be quite seductive (it gets you off the hook for doing any self introspection and work), it can be more exhausting than simply being honest with yourself. Also, and most importantly, the “victim role” mentality can make it virtually impossible to realize significant breakthroughs for progress…yet totally possible to experience consistent breakdowns in making progress within any aspect of your life. Breakthroughs = Empowerment + Growth + Happiness Breakdowns = Disempowerment + Stagnation + Sadness To effectively breakthrough a personal, professional or emotional obstacle, the driving force behind it is taking responsibility for your actions and trusting yourself. For many, this can be easier said than done! Let’s take a moment to look at both of those drivers more closely: Responsibility: You gain significant empowerment and freedom when you choose to shift your perspective from assigning blame to accepting responsibility. And although you may feel in control when assigning blame to others for your personal obstacles, the reality is you are totally out of control. Why? You have given your power to someone else. And even though it may feel like a “relief” initially, it can manifest itself into more stress later. You simply cannot resolve personal issues, and have breakthroughs, when the power is not your own. At the point of assigning blame, and releasing all responsibility for challenges in your life, not only have you given all the power to others, your “destiny” becomes based on their next move and decisions…not yours. And, being able to shift your perspective to being someone who takes responsibility, starts with having self-trust. Self-Trust: Self-trust is the foundation to our being. If you do not have self-trust, whom can you really trust? And, suffering from lack of self-trust leads to self-doubt. Having doubt in yourself is a powerful force that can set you up for failure in anything you attempt. Why? Because you are already assuming the decisions you make, and actions you take, probably aren’t the right ones, and they won’t provide you with the results you desire. Think of this in terms of (2) real-world scenarios: Scenario One: You want to make a career change because you’re bored or very unhappy with your current occupation. If you lack self-trust, your decision of making a change could be clouded by self-defeating “doubt” questions like: Am I smart enough to do this? Can I afford to do this? What will my friends, family and peers think? What if they think I’m stupid for making this career change? By having those types of self-doubt questions running through your brain you can actually talk yourself out of making the career change before you even try! Or, even before you look at options and first steps to making the career change. And what is the result of that? Being stuck in a career you no longer enjoy and wishing you were doing something else…yet never even trying to make the change happen! Scenario Two: You don’t have enough business and you’re struggling…but have your REALLY done the work to get more business? Or do find yourself blaming the economy, the competition, the powers that be? I have clients who come to me complaining about lack of business. And when I ask them what their business development strategies have been (prior hiring me), they tell me and I don’t doubt they’ve been struggling. Posting a couple blog posts, a few tweets here and there, created a website, and occasionally go to networking events. And they truly believe the “problem” is all about the economy. They soon realize they are not doing enough, they need to take responsibility for that, and they need to stop blaming others for their lack of business success. Take some time to ask yourself:
Your personal success and business success depend on YOU…you can have the best brand platform in the world, a terrific marketing strategy, an amazing book…but none of them will get you where you want if the demons in your head constantly try to sell you garbage…and you buy it! Cheers to your happiness & success! Lisa 2 Responses to “Do You Struggle With Having Breakdowns vs Breakthroughs?”Leave a Reply |
Gosh Lisa, It feels like you wrote this for me… not really, but the message hits home! Time to step up and see myself as powerful instead of hanging out in confusion. Thanks, I needed this!
Marilyn
Thank-You so much. I needed that.